Every marriage has its challenges as we are people that come from different life styles and background. However, marrying someone from a completely different country than ours makes it even more challenging.
Today we will discussing the major three challenges from a interracial marriage.
First challenge : LANGUAGE
Most of the time when you marry someone from another country, the have their own language. Even if it’s the same language like Spanish, every country has its own accent and way of saying things. Now marrying someone from a completely different country with a foreign language makes it even more challenging as communicating has a strain on it.
You are used to saying things in your own way in your language, now communicating those ideas to another person in a different language can be huge challenge.
I personally feel that even when you are completely fluent in a second language it can never compare to your native language. You may be able to send across your message but perhaps not in the tone of voice or the way you’d express it in your tongue language.
Second challenge: Culture
Being married to someone from another country means, another culture. This includes so much!
This means the way they see women or men, the way they see life, what they think is wrong or right base on culture background. For example: I’m Spanish raised in America. I have a more liberal and independent mindset, where as my husband, he is from Turkey and has the middle eastern culture. They are more reserved in all aspects. The women tend to be more submissive to their husbands opinions and decisions where a Spanish/American is equal. This can at times become more challenging if the differences are not put on the table at the foundation *beginning * of the relationship. Even after expressing your culture background and talking about your major differences, discrepancies and clashes are inevitably going to arise.
Third Challenge: Traditions
Very close to Culture, traditions are another challenge in a multiracial marriage.
The important holidays or the way they celebrate each tradition can be completely different. An example can be weddings. You may come from a simple low key wedding where your spouse may have a long elaborated wedding tradition. Or when having children, I noticed that my traditions and my husbands were different,. I recall one specific one, we Spanish tend to have a baby shower before birth to pitch in for the arrival of the baby. Some people may give gifts or money, however Turkish don’t always have showers. They celebrate the arrival of the baby 40 days after the baby is born and they “donate” money to the child which I found it a little awkward. But here again is an example of tradition differences. Like that there will be many more differences.
HOW TO OVERCOME THEM: Clear Communication and willingness to compromise. Be clear on what you expect, what are the things you will not bend for and the things you can bypass. Meet each other half way so you both feel like you are still YOU even though you are married to someone very different.
it Is worth it when it’s the right person and both are willing to adjust to the change.
Thank you for reading this post!